The Mini-burger

FanFic in the Birmoverse

New Order – by Havock

For Sergeant Major Bo Jaason the retreat and subsequent sea journey from Kuwait had been nothing short of a nightmare. The organizational process of withdrawing as a result of the wave had been littered with disaster after disaster, catastrophe was more the word he thought, and they’d lost no fewer than 50% of the ships which had set out. A combination of missile attacks, suicide boats and a single stray Iranian Tango class sub had played bloody hell with the fleets departure in the confined waters of the Gulf, seemed every rag headed, religious nut job had come out to have a crack at the US and its allies.



Well he thought to himself, at least we had gotten out almost intact as a unit, others had not fared so well.


But still, as he gazed across the country side at the remnants of his 7th Cavalry regiment, the anger he had fought so hard to bury, to try and focus on what needed to be done burst forth just momentarily,

payback, ………..fuckin A” he muttered,

a small grin slowly crept across his ace, at some point, we’ll get oursbefore speaking to nobody in particular, “make no mistake you mother fuckers, in time, in time for sure”.


As his mind came slowly back to focus at the matters on hand a voice called out.

Sarnt Major”,

the accent, without a doubt British and using the typical clipped British wording, Sarnt, no g in Sergeant for these poms,

God fucking help me”, he thought, rolling he eyes.


Turning to the regiments newly appointed British Army liaison officer, Captain Richard ‘Tabby Mc Gee.

Morning G, how are we this fine Humid stinking fucking hot Australian day Sir”.

Alone, they had come to an understanding, on the Captains insistence, that with no other persons around, it should be an informal relationship, “the better to get shit done” , as the Captain had so forthrightly pointed out.


Grinning from ear to ear and already sweating profusely, G continued making his way up the shaily outcrop, finally, panting and laced with sweat in his spanky new Auscam uniform, stopping beside the Sergeant major,  who continued to intently look out across the valley, red billowing dust clouds now rising from the 7th Cavs vehicles, along with British and Australian Cavalry units, who this morning were playing opfor for his regiments troopers.


Well Sir”, the RSM, casting a sideways glance at the Captain continued,

I think our boys down there, are doing a good job, better I suspect to have them training, rather than in barracks and thinking to much”,

Finished, the Sergeant Major, bent over, slowly picking up a piece of shaily rock, tossing it in his big paws a couple of times, as if weighting up what he was thinking, before turning once more to the Captain.


I suspect Sir this may well be our home for sometime yet, it could be a lot worse, at least here we have security and space, plus the grub as the aussies call it , is not too bad, had any croc yet Sir”.


Captain McGee chuckled, as soon as the RSM had used his Rank in the conversation, he knew it was going to be some flippant form of remark, true to form, the RSM has not let him down,

Yes Sarnt Major, I have in fact, and it’s not at all bad if I do say so myself, but I fear based on the Intel briefing this morning, we shall not be enjoying the Aussies company for that much longer”.


His face fixing in a grim expression the captain proceeded to slowly stretch his neck from side to side, letting out a small groan when hearing a satisfying crack, a bone clicked back into place,

Arh that’s better, now to matters at hand Sarnt Major”.


Yes Sir”,

The RSM did not take his eyes off the scenes below, rather he continued to multitask,


it does seem G , in light of recent events we shall be having an O Group in about three hours, I think that little move by the Thai’s in closing the Malacca straights without notice has troubled our Japanese friends somewhat”.


What’s more, now that the Chinese or at least elements have got their shit together, Seattle and Pearl , along with our new friends here are some what nervous”.


 Reaching around to the back of his combat webbing the Sergeant Major grabbed a map case and proceeded to extract three maps, slowly flicking rough the maps until with a satisfied grunt, removing the last map and bending over placing it down on the ground between he two of them, swatting at several persistent flies whilst doing so.

Fucking flies, don’t they ever go away?, Don’t answer that G, not one god dam word”


Finished with his mini outburst and seeing from the look on the captains face that the mood had lightened somewhat, the RSM proceeded on.


“Sir this here is a large scale map of the Indonesian Archipelago and Northern Australia ”, tracing his finger over the map, the 7th Cavalry’s senior Non Commissioned officer proceeded to run through the military dispositions in theatre.


Sir its now , what?, 13 months since the event and the subsequent shit fight that followed, we’ve established ourselves pretty well here and from all accounts the Executive Office is slowly getting its shit together, although the rumblings I am hearing about Military aspirations in Seattle are a little disconcerting, but there is fuck all I can do about that, what does scare the living hell out of me is this Indian Naval Task force and Amphibious group with it, which I guess is also the reason you are here after the Intelligence briefing, but I will come back to that”.


Currently we have units scattered to hell and gone, but their rough disposition should enable us to kick he living fuck out of any band thugs in these here parts, that TF though, well it needs culling down some, and very soon”.


Ok, sorry bout that, now currently we have 1 under strength company of the 7th Cav regiment deployed to Christmas Island, attached with them is some  arty and their own organic air elements for transport and maritime surveillance, Blackhawk’s, Kiowa’s and the like, plus 12 Apache D model Longbows. The Aussies have two troops of reservists, Mech Infantry on the island and we deployed a battery of patriot Sam’s as well. The Poms, sorry Sir, your! Brothers, have most kindly stationed a full squadron of GR3 Tornados and they are backed up by some 11 F16XL’s from the Kentucky Air National guard.

We’ve also got AWACs as well.


THAT”, the RSM repeated himself to emphasis the point,


That should ensure the island is kept out of trouble in the short term, I know the Navy, that’s both ours and yours have surface units stationed around it as well, who would ever have thought, that a small shitty island would be the central hub and safe transit point from Europe and the Mid to Australia and the US, it gives us full coverage when linked with Diego across the IO”.


Taking in what the Sarnt major had said to date the Captain straightened up somewhat, whilst still crouched down, then spoke,


Well Sarnt, given the sub continent went to shit, pirates hijacking every fucking surface vessel that gets even remotely close to them, two nuke boats on the rampage, China starting to flex warlord muscles and who the hell else knows getting all frisky, that joint is a serious piece of real estate, what’s more, it gives us defensive depth, we can project power from there right up to the sub continent itself, especially once those sea bees get the new runways operational”.


It had come as a rude surprise, thousand of refugees from all across the subcontinent had started out for not only Indonesia , but trying for the Australian mainland, cyclonic conditions had wreaked havoc with the first departures, killing thousands as they were caught mid ocean. The collapse of Indonesia had made maters even more complicated, the now ruling extreme right wing Muslim fundamentalists had sealed all borders , then immediately they had made a play for Timor and the Gas and Oil fields to its south, only the rapid insertion of ARA Infantry units and elements of her already strained special forces has thwarted the attempt, but not before both sides had clashed in several bloody battles across the island.


Now though, the northern extremes of the Australian continent  was the most densely populated military area on the planet, new bases had sprung up at nearly all the northern ports, RAAF bases which where once cold sites had been activated and those already in place expanded. RAAF Curtain Wyndham, Kunnanurra, Derby , Sherga and numerous more were all bustling with activity.


US forces and British Forces were all deployed to these along with their maintenance personnel. You could not have snuck a bird through the airspace up north or even swam ashore, given the density of airborne radar, subs and naval surface vessels currently paroling the northern climes. But Asia was starting to get its act together, there had been severe blood letting all across the pacific and countries command and control was largely now in the hands of a select few, the ANZUS alliance had grown into the single strongest strategic Military force on the planet, largely intact due to their isolation from Europe and several times they had already flexed their muscles, showing the recipients, just how strong they still were.


Captain McGee traced a finger across the RSM’s map, stopping on a small island.


Sarnt, it seems that from discussions with Lieutenant General Murphy in Hawaii, that the elements of the 25th we have here, plus some Marines and attachments are quite possibly going on a beach Holiday, that is, AFTER! we have taken the beach back from the fuckers”.


Captain McGee’s finger was resting squarely on the Island of Cuba, as he continued to scan the map, sweat now forming across his brow dripped onto the RSM’s laid out map sheet with a loud splat!.


Looking up from underneath his Auscam Giggle hat,  the RSM fixed a stare at the young British officer, who upon hearing his sweat drop onto the map, did like wise, knowing what was about to come forth from the RSM, Captain McGee broke into a wide grin and sat upright.


“Captain, If you don’t mind, I will try and keep these here maps, which the Military has so lovingly furnished me with,……… intact a while longer, water a sweat permitting of course”.


It was still only 0800 hours, but the temperature here in Northern WA was already climbing into the high 20’s as the Australians called it, for some god unknown reason the aussies used Celsius and not the old Fahrenheit system, it had been a devil of a time learning the conversions.


Looking out across the shimmering scrub, the heat haze was already formed, shimmering into distortion the landscape and vehicles as they moved about, about another half hour thought the RSM, and the exercise would be called off, two reasons mainly, one was the heat, the troopers were already accustomed too it, so they saw no point in unnecessary wear and tear on man or machine, but the biggie was fuel and maintenance parts, both of which were not in abundant supply.


“ Well Sarnt Major, I shall see if I can order in some deodorant by Fed Ex, when they are up and running again that is, in the mean time, I will, or should say, SHALL, endeavor to keep ya maps dry my good man”. The last part delivered in an accentuated British accent, brought an instant smile to the RSM’s face.


Folding the maps up carefully and then placing them back in his map case, the RSM turned serious, “ Sir, I don’t mean to pry, but do you have family in the UK , have you been able to get in contact with anybody”.


16 March, 2009 - Posted by | Without Warning


  1. A nice read – I look forward to the next installment. A China v India scenario would be very compelling.

    Comment by LERMONTOV | 18 March, 2009 | Reply

  2. Looks like you’ve been practicing a bit Hav. Shaping up into a good story.

    Comment by Therbs | 19 March, 2009 | Reply

  3. Getting better. I like where this is going.

    On the Outer Marches

    Comment by sfmurphy1971 | 23 March, 2009 | Reply

  4. Hav – thumbs up. Who woulda thunk it?

    Comment by brian | 25 March, 2009 | Reply

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